What do you fear?

Maybe we don’t talk about them much, but I bet we all have fears. Being scammed, identity theft, serious illness, the state our world. Fear flourishes better in the dark, where it likes to hide. Acronyms come to mind: False Evidence Appearing Real; Face Everything And Recover.

One of my earliest fears was of the dark. A night light was essential, and the double white closet doors in my room had to be tightly shut to keep the monsters inside.

It’s interesting how our fears change over the years, maybe as we live through them. Like the fear of not being able to make the mortgage payment. Of getting that terrifying call in the middle of the night when our children were teenagers. Of being completely alone.

What are some of your fears now? I’ll go first.

• Not having enough money for my needs through the end of my life. I know I’m not alone in this. My mother feared this and passed it on to me! There are articles in our senior news sources. We all know how costly long term health care is and that we are living longer. Will we outlive our money?
• Being a caregiver of a loved one. I hate to admit this one. My past experiences should be a help. Instead, it’s rather because of them. I know how hard it is – physically, emotionally, and financially – and how it could trigger trauma for me.
• Becoming cognitively impaired (dementia, Alzheimer’s). Again, I know many of us have this concern. We find our keys in the refrigerator; we can’t remember what we did on Tuesday. We’re continuously asking each other, “Do you think I’m losing it?”

What can we do about these fears? Specifically for those I’ve listed, I try to live as simply as possible. I work on maintaining my health through both physical and mental exercises. I have good friends and close relationships. Generally, I journal, to get the scurrying thoughts out of my head. I pray.

I often hear, “If you pray, don’t worry.” I have never perfected that one. Also, that faith and fear cannot co-exist. In my world, they can and do. And rather than faith being the opposite of fear, I believe that love is. When I am able to really love and be open to being loved, fear dissipates. Perfect love casts out fear. (I John 4:18)